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Friday, April 27, 2007

Believe Me


Oh, all ye people of little FAITH! See what is before you and TREMBLE at the awesomeness of my Awesome revelation! For I finally have CONCLUSIVE, IRREFUABLE proof of extraterrestrial life visiting this planet! Feast your eyes on the above pic! What do you see? To some, it is a strange zig-zaggy light. To others, it might seem like the camera was bummped while taking a picture of something bright in the dark. I, however, know it to be none of the above. It is, in fact, a picture of an extraterrestrial being in the shape of a large light dog zipping through the earth's atmosphere! Staggering, isn't it? But there it is. I think these light-entities are taking the form of dogs because they know we consider dogs to be human's best friend, and they want to communicate their friendly intentions. Aren't they way smart? They may even be interdimentional as well as intergalactic travelers-- I just don't know yet.
So, you may ask, "How do you know these are light-dog entities from another galaxy?" A very good question, for which I have a very good answer. I believe it to be true. And that's all I need. Because belief is stronger than the strongset steel. More immovable than the largest mountan. More inpenetrable than the deepest fog. As really Super Spectacluar as the picture is, I don't need it. Because I have faith in the illumicanines (that's the name I have coined for our most Revered and Stupendous guests), I just know they are there.
That is the beauty of faith. It is what it is. If you have it, it is real. Faith doesn't need proof, it has itself. I mean, how elegant is THAT? I am a real supporter of faith. Well, as long as it isn't stupid faith. That, I've got no time for. Like , for example, those Native Americans who call G-d "the Great Spirit". Please. Yahweh. Now THAT'S a name for G-d. Or, the Holy Ghost! I don't know about you, but that just resonates. Even Allah has got a ring to it. How do I know what the right name for G-d is? I just do. Cause that is faith. And GOOD faith, the kind I like-- well, that's the STUFF!!
The other day, Jimbo and I were on our way to the mall when we got behind this car that had a really great bumpersticker that drives home this point. It said, "If you think you are perfect, try walking on water". Yeah. Can't do it, can ya? Well, it just goes to show you... yeah. THAT, my friend, is the power of faith. If you are a Believer, you KNOW you can't walk on watter. You take it on faith. But all of these other, science-y types, they have to go falling in to the lake, getting all wet, and maybe drowning before they know the Unalterable truth. You can't walk on water. That's what MY faith gives me. In your FACE, un-faith types!
Those un-faithers out there kinda worry me. I mean, if they don't think like I do, what's to keep them from practicing their un-faith all rampantly, and squeezing out MY faith? I think that is a really big concern. What if everybody just went around believing or not believing as they wished? Hmm? What then? I shudder to think.
Greeting to the Illumicanines
Oh! Great glowing Dog of the Cosmos! Thank you
for gracing me with your presence. I am here, and I have
FAITH!!!

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